In 1985 as I was completing my senior in high school, I was fortunate enough to have take a physics course taught by Mr. Gerry Bardouche. I learned a lot in his class, although most of it had nothing to do with physics. During class Mr. Bardouche (or "uncle Gerry" as we affectionately referred to him) would enlighten us with little pearls of wisdom that gave us peek into his inner life. At some point I decided that Gerry’s non-sequiturs were way more interesting to keep track of than were anything we were “officially” supposed to be discussing. Years later I was asked to share this recollection with the school superintendent; for some reason she was not amused. So anyway, here’s what I learned my senior year: